She's an adult. A real adult. She has an apartment. She has a job. She has a boyfriend. She has a dog. Yet somehow when I look at her with my heart I still see the little girl.
When I finally tumbled into bed, she had already settled in, her breathing was even and steady, she


Anna has always been my hand holder. We have so many pictures of just our hands and still at almost 22, she will grab my hand. The hand holding is a tradition I've continued with the Little's as well. When something is important or "big" we hold hands to share the news, when we're tired or sad we hold hands, when we walk down the street we hold hands. A few months ago when a new family visited our church the family had a teenage daughter as we watched them walk across the parking lot the daughter reached over and grabbed her moms hand and Melissa gasped, "Mom! I can be friends with her, she's holding her moms hand!!!"
I realized the other night there is something intimate and special about listening to your child breathe. Praying over them as they sleep and trusting them to God. It made me think about my Mom and all the prayers I know she has offered over me. During my 20's, 30's and into my 40's when I'd go home for a visit I always looked forward to laying in her bed with the hushed, end of day conversations as we waited for Dad to lock up the house and come to bed. Those were treasured memories, we weren't holding hands, we were holding hearts. I knew we weren't just talking, she was praying for me, for my husband, my kids...my life. I didn't quite comprehend the specialness of those times until I was listening to Anna the other night and I realized that with my parents across the street I no longer have that opportunity with my Mom. I know she still says just as many prayers, we talk every day-usually several times a day but that quiet time is past.
I'm so crazy blessed to have a Mom who taught me the importance of the quiet moments. Savoring every moment together. I'm hugging my kids a little closer these last few days, savoring their unique smells, the feel of their hands in mine, the way their voice sounds, the texture of their hair. I want to remember all those things so when they are grown and these precious moments have passed so I can always hold their hearts when their hands aren't close!
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